But did you ever consider the cost that sign represents? The life behind the name on the sign... and the impact its loss had on people? I have friends who, if they had been putting up the signs at the time, would have had one.
Susie- excellent student, candy-striper. So very loveable. Was going to be a nurse- an only child. Some say her boyfriend was racing someone, others say not. It didn't matter though because when he lost control of his car, the accident ended her life. The loss was devastating to her parents and to all of us who knew her. And who knows how many lives she would have touched had she been able to become the nurse she had dreamed of being. No sign could reflect the cost her loss represented.
Chris- bright, loveable. Honor student, and a heck of a good saxophonist. He could play ALL of the varieties (soprano, alto, tenor, and baritone).. and he played them all well. (It has been 25 years and every time I hear the song "Careless Whisper" I remember him.) Was driving home on a Sunday afternoon after a 4-H meeting (he was an officer), lost control of his vehicle and hit a tree. He was in band with many of my friends. I still remember my best friend calling me as I was on the way out the door to youth choir rehearsal and asked "Have you heard?? Chris is dead!") I don't even remember what he had intended to do with himself, but whatever he did, he would have done it well. But there is no way his life could have been measured by such a sign.
And then there was Railey. The trip had gotten to be a routine one for him. One of his aunts had died a couple of months before the accident. Because he worked the crazy-crunch weekend schedule (3p-11p on Friday, 3p-7a on Saturday, and 3p-11a on Sunday) he was off during the week, so he tried to go up to Atlanta to visit his widowed uncle, spend time with him, and just keep him busy and engaged. It was the sort of thing he did for people who mattered to him. And sometimes while they were there, the two of them would make the rounds to check on some of the other relatives. On one such occasion, they went to check in on one who recently had been to the ER because of a fall. Railey took one look at her front steps and pieced together why she had fallen. The steps, which were wood, did what wood does when it is exposed to moisture and to various states of shade and sun. Namely, it grew mold, which made them slippery. He and his uncle made an immediate detour to a home repair warehouse, got some outdoor carpet & nails, and proceeded to clean and carpet the steps so she would not slip again. Again very like him because if there was a problem that needed to be dealt with it, he got it done right then-- he didn't wait to do it later.
On Tuesday, October 2, 2012, he got off to a later start than he intended. He had a couple of errands he had to take care of, and then had stopped by his parents to drop off an anniversary card for them and to say hello. They weren't in, so he went on north. Best we can piece together, he was making a routine pass on one of the four-lane divided highway. As he made that pass, I figure he looked back over his left shoulder as he always did before passing on the left and then went. He caught a stick on the road which caused him to lose control of his bike and hit a tree. He died within an hour of the accident.
His uncle, (the same one who he was going to see and is a Pentecostal minister) shared the story of them fixing the relative's steps and a couple of other similar stories. The Director of Nursing at his nursing home told of a couple of other stories of kindnesses he had done for his co-workers including making the drive to Tallahassee to check on a CNA whose child was hospitalized with new-onset diabetes to make sure she had everything she needed... then later, took time to sit down with her and teach her what she needed to know to manage her son's illness. He also went to check on another coworker whose son had been injured in an accident. He had a knack for getting through to some of their tougher residents. And if problems came up over the weekend in the building, he took care of them very competently and efficiently. I know of him having gone up to the hospital here in Tallahassee with a mutual friend who had gone into premature labor and stayed with her until her own husband could drive over from out of town. And who knows how many more such kindnesses he did, because he didn't brag about that kind of stuff. He didn't do it with the expectation of anything in return-- he did it because it was kind, decent, and right.
A small black-on-white sign, bearing the words "Drive Safely" with a name and date of death does so little to express the impact of the life that was lost on all those who new the deceased. If one that reads "Drive Safely! Samuel Railey Efurd, III Oct 2 2012 goes up, it will do just as little to reflect who he was as the other signs do.
